Home By Christmas (2006)

Title: Home By Christmas
Year of Release: 2006
Available On: Hulu as of 08/2018
Rating: .5 out of 5 Jingle Bells

A supposedly wealthy woman catches her husband cheating and all she gets in the divorce is $25,000? 2006 wasn’t that long ago – in fact, my parents got divorced not long before that and their house (they are not wealthy) and the house was worth far more than $50K. You can’t even buy a luxury car for that much!

This movie is horrific. Oh my god, it’s so bad. Linda Hamilton looks tired throughout the movie and I wouldn’t normally even mention that because who cares, but I feel like her facial expressions reflect the reality of the film. It sucks. It super duper sucks.

Andie: I hate Daddy! He’s a stupid idiot!

Minus points for Julie’s headbands and puffed up front hair. Minus points for everyone saying, “I’m sure your ex left you comfortable.” Minus points for all the jerkwads from her former life who don’t help Julie when she needs it. Minus points for all of the poverty-shaming and ‘hood-shaming done by Andie and her mom re: school. This poor lady’s whole life falls apart and it’s horrible to watch. Poorly acted, poorly written, and not at all worth whatever moralistic, capitalistic bullshit “message” it’s supposed to convey. Half a jingle bell awarded because folks talk openly about people who have died and I like depictions of healthy grief.

Don’t watch this movie. I couldn’t finish it.